Keep The Good, Not The Bad

A support system is vital to your path towards greatness. You have to surround yourself with people that are in your corner. People that support your goals. People that will motivate and that have an interest in what you are doing. People that will help you snap back if you slip and people that will cheer you on no matter what.

But we all have people in our lives that are constant negative influences.

You tell them you want to lose ten pounds, they say “yeah right” and “what will one more cookie do?” They make fun of your salad you order at lunch and roll their eyes when you order a water.

You tell them you want to get your college degree in music performance, they say “get a real degree that will pay the bills” and “what will you even do with that?” They shake their heads when you practice hours on end crafting your skill.

These people need to change and support you. Or get the fuck out of your life!

All they are doing is bringing you down. Yeah sometimes negative comments are fuel for the fire, but think how much more progress could be made with positive stimulation. Maybe they’re jealous because you have the courage to change and want something better for yourself. They just pull you back to stay at their level. You’re above that!

There are two things that need to be done. Ask them to stop and start to encourage you. Or just stop associating with them.

In to the light
(image source: flickr)

Leave them behind and continue on your path.

These people might be friends, family, coworkers or even your “other half.” Sometimes in life you’ll need to detach from these types of people to get what you want.

It’s your life, your dreams, your passions, your goals. Surround yourself by the best team you can create. Keep the good influences, drop the bad ones.

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6 thoughts on “Keep The Good, Not The Bad

  1. Ruaca

    I dealt with that during my half marathon training. I found one of my friends who ran MUCH better than I who I asked to sign up with me (thinking she’d be supportive) began competing with me, even though she blows me away I was scratching my head thinking what the hell is she doing? Why was she feeling so threatened by me who finished an hour later then her? “It was preposterous. But, it hurt me so much and I found myself feeling so pissed off and self conscious by the whole thing it took the fun and excitement of finishing it from me. It ruined our friendship. I can only think that a lot of our respected running peers were so interested in my journey and talking about it with me it pissed her off. But, I think they were genuinely interested, because I was so excited and passionate it reminded them of what it was like to be that enthusiastic. She fucked all of that up for me. I will never be able to tell her until I leave my job, but I will one day. She pretended to be supportive and passive-aggressively hurt my feelings every chance she got to show me what a failure I was in running compared to her. I finished. I never let let her get to me publicly. I kept it inside. When I thought of quitting I thought of her. I hurt myself training because of her. I vented here, because I couldn’t even post it on my blog in case she read it. Many people suck. I would never step on someone’s goals or dreams. She even finds a way to now dis my blog… I can’t wait to find a new job and tell her to fuck off. Rant over, ha ha.. This blog hit a nerve. I know the feeling! 🙂

    Reply
    1. Joey Post author

      Let it out, let it out! Haha. Something I’ve been trying to think about is that you have no idea what battles people have going on inside of them. It sounds rude what she did, but maybe underneath she might be dealing with a lot. Use running and writing to let the frustration out. Maybe think of a nice and civil way to tell her she hurt you and maybe the relationship could be rekindled?

      Reply
      1. Ruaca

        She is not a girls girl, I am usually ok with that, but she seriously is way to competitive in everything. It does my head in. I am not trying to compete with anyone. I’ve told her that. She didn’t understand why I didn’t want to try and beat the men and why would I want to run the women’s Nike Half Marathon? She clearly runs for completely different reasons and motivation than I. But, for some reason knocking me down made her feel superior. I really don’t want to save that friendship. That type of person uses people for their own gain.. I keep her at arms length now with a smile 😉 ha ha. Cut loose…

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