Looking Good On A Treadmill

A good subtitle for this would be:
How To Pick Up Chicks At The Gym.

Last night a snow storm came through Atlanta. We got an overwhelming 2 inches of snow! I woke up to everything frozen over and I didn’t want to risk injury running outside…So I took it to the treadmill! It has been a few years since I’ve used a treadmill but I thought I would share my list on how to look good while in the gym. I figured I can’t be the only one out there that had or has to use the treadmill in the a Winter months. I hope my tips help you out.

1. Shorts. You’ve got to look like you belong in the gym so running shorts won’t cut it there. My go-tos are basketball shorts. Girls don’t like guys with really short shorts, so make sure you get a pair that are below the knees. Also you want to get a size bigger than normal, so you can hold them up with one hand.

2. Shirt. Just take it off immediately. Every girl there will be fantasizing about you. And bonus points if you can flex the entire time (gives the appearance that you’re ripped all the time.)

3. Point, Shoot and Wink. This one is key. When you make eye contact with a female, pull out the imaginary hand gun of yours. The trick is to shoot and wink at the exact time after you point it at her. Believe me guys, it makes them melt inside.

4. Spit. Just treat this like a normal training run outside. If you have to spit, no point in keeping it in your mouth.

5. Sing Out Loud! Bring your iPod to the gym. It shows you have money and that you really love to workout. When you’re favorite tunes come on, sing them out loud. No one likes the techno beats the gym plays anyways, so might as well share with everyone what you’re listening to. Just make sure the songs are on the Billboard Top 20 right now.

Bonus
6. Speed. When you have a minute left to go on your run, crank the treadmill as fast as it will go. It should be beyond your maximum effort here. Don’t hold onto the sides if you feel like you can’t hold the pace. Chicks don’t like that. Instead, if you can’t handle it, just fall off. Pick yourself back up. This is where that saying “fall two times, get up three” came from. Women love a man that can pick himself up.

Hope these help you out the next time you have to jump on the treadmill. Let me know how these work for you!

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17 thoughts on “Looking Good On A Treadmill

  1. Christine Hendler

    Hilarious blog!!!! Just the right amount of sarcastic, silly and soooo true! Beautifully written. BTW up in the Blue Ridge Mountains we had lotsa snow and temps below the temps at the North Pole!!

    Reply

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